Do you have drama in your life? I mean, a bit too much?

Arguments, gossip, stress, anger, upset, resentment, etc?

Do you think you may be addicted to drama?

You probably say: Absolutely not! I hate it, it drains me, and it upsets me.

No doubt that’s how it makes you feel.

But, let me explain something.
There are some feelings we like to experience and some that we don’t like to feel.
One of the feelings we all try to avoid is boredom.
Boredom is a lack of excitement.

We like excitement.

When something gives us excitement, may it be a hobby, your partner or friends, competing in sports, games, or being creative, it’s so easy to get hooked on it, and we seek it as often as we can. And that’s great.

All these examples are pretty positive ways to experience some excitement, and there is nothing wrong with getting “addicted” to it as long as it adds positivity to our life.

I’m addicted to learning about the mind, personal development, communication, and human behaviour. I cannot get enough of it.

But excitement can come in a negative form as well.
You guessed it, in the form of drama.
And it’s even easier to get hooked on it (addicted) than the positive forms.

Our mind wants and seeks to experience certain emotions, and it’s quite secondary how it’s going to get it. The easier, the better.
So if we don’t have a positive way to experience excitement, your mind will find a way.
It’s so easy to get addicted to drama because it’s so easy to be involved in it or to just stir some sh*t up to create it.

Below are several indicators that drama maybe your addiction.

1) You gossip, A LOT

Let’s be honest. All of us indulge in a bit of gossip every now and then. It’s part of being a social being. But if you find yourself quite often talking about others, being judgemental about their imperfections, shortcomings, failures, or even trashing their success, it’s most likely your way of creating or getting involved in some drama.

It’s a horrible thing to do. Stop it!
Plus it makes you paranoid that others do it to you, too!

2) You get involved in arguments

This one can be seen most often in relationships. When things get a little dull and boring, the easiest way to add a little excitement is to stir some sh*t up. Digging up some old issues and resentments will sure do.

Stop it. You’re ruining your relationship.

3) You complain a lot

Complaining is probably the easiest way to get a bit of drama going. One has to do literally nothing, especially not changing what they are complaining about. It’s “a great” way to get a bit of attention and maybe even some pitty. #drama

But keep this in mind that people have enough of their own problems, and no one really wants to know about yours, especially if you don’t want to do something about it.

If you have problems you want to solve, find people who can help you with it. That’s the way to deal with it.

4) You cling on the past

One thing we can be sure about is we cannot change the past. We all have had all kinds of challenges we’ve had to deal with in the past. If you’re constantly thinking or talking about something negative that happened in the past, perfectly knowing that there is nothing you can do about it, unwilling to let go of it or work on letting go of it, then it’s most likely your drama fix.

Let go so you can be free.

5) You turn little things into big problems

Life is not perfect, and things happen. People who love drama tend to turn little things into big deals and problems that they obsess about. Maybe you’re telling others about it, and maybe you’re just stewing yourself in it in your head. Same thing.

If you’ve ever been called a Drama queen, then this one applies to you.

When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.

6) You’re drawn to social media turmoils and gossips

Ahh, Social media. It always amazes me when some people have the time and energy to get involved in arguments and dramas on social media.

But I‌ get it, it’s exciting, one can say whatever they want, often anonymously hiding behind the screen and keyboard.
But how is it adding to your life really?‌
Isn’t there a better way to use your time?‌

7) You make a big deal out of your little efforts

Drama queens (and kings) not only turn small things into big problems but when they actually make an effort, they sure let everyone know about it.

“OMG, I had to like literally take the stairs to the 4th floor, can you imagine?‌”

Ever heard something like that?

If you suspect you may be trying to milk your every little effort, just pay attention to how impressed other people are with it.

If they just go “eh-mmm, sure” without glancing away from their monitor, then you’re dramatizing something that’s not even worth mentioning.

I suggest you stop it because when you actually have something worth recognition, people won’t take it seriously.

8) You stir things up

Ok, if you often find yourself in the middle of some drama, may it be the above examples or some other forms of it, there is a good chance you may be the firestarter.

You need to ask yourself whether you actually triggered it or at least added some fuel to it.

If you have, then you should work on restraining yourself because all that is probably making other people’s life miserable.

People will like you much more if you bring positive energy, and you’ll like yourself more, too.

Worth a shot, no?‌

9) You love reality TV and the tabloid magazines

Drama is exactly the reason why people get hooked on these.
These TV shows and magazines are focused on gossip and on exposing people (usually only doing what all of us do).

“But OMG‌ can you believe???”

From all the forms of adding drama to your life, these are probably the most harmless to you.

If someone wants to be in a reality TV, that’s their thing.
But I personally have an issue of paparazzi spying on other people intruding their privacy just to have spread some gossip.
If you were in the position of the targeted person, you would not like it either. So don’t support it by reading it.

I’m pretty sure you have better things to do with your time no?
Why would you waste time watching others trying to catch them on something?‌

Life is too short for that.

10) Silence freaks you out

Silence is peaceful, and peace can be quite boring if you’re haven’t yet discovered its power.

Drama addicts tend to hate silence.

If sitting or doing things in silence freaks you out or makes you very uncomfortable, it’s probably because you’re used to the buzz of excitement, possibly drama excitement.

Explore silence.
There is so much happening in there.
It will help you find, appreciate, and enjoy the better you.

How do you break your drama addiction?‌

First of all, find positive ways to bring excitement into your life.

The easiest way is to exercise or do some sport. Not only it will get your endorphins and adrenalin going, but it’s also good for you.
You can find some hobbies or the right people to socialize with.

Do you want a never-ending source of excitement and real drama in your life?‌ Start a business, haha.

Secondly, in one of my previous articles, I talked about the concept of emotional home.

It’s a certain mix of emotions and emotional intensity we are used to and comfortable with.
If drama is what you’re used to, then you need to work on bringing your default emotional state down a bit.

Great ways to do that are: Meditation (it has loads of other benefits), relaxation, and restrain yourself from the 10 examples above and from stirring up unnecessary drama.

Hope that helps.

Peace on you. 😉

If you’d like to work with me, see how life coaching could help you, and give your life a good push, contact me and let’s schedule the initial discovery session and find out if we’d be a good fit.

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